Wednesday, June 12, 2013

With what language do I speak to God?



When I was a child I didn't really speak like a child -sorry Paul or Saul or whatever your name is.
I was precocious. I couldn't always correctly pronounce the words I knew but  they were not childish words by any stretch of the imagination. A diet of classical literature from the library and superhero comics picked up at a junk store filled me with multi-syllables a-plenty. I read the Odyssey and knew that Odysseus's wife was Penelope but in my head it was pronounced Penny-lope. I read Marvel's Thor comics so I knew about Asgard and Odin as well as I knew about the effects of kryptonite on Superman. The point is I wasn't a dumb kid. But prayer left me feeling I was. In my early youth I went to Catholic church and the mass was in Latin. I had read the Aenid and even had a bash at some of Bocaccio but the lord's prayer got me.I said `Pater noster,qui est in caelis,sanctificetur nomen tuum.'
but I might as well have said 'Salagadoola mechicka boola bibbidi-bobbidi-boo' for all the meaning I could attach to it. And even as the language of worship became English I felt that the rhythm and 
metre of the words were more important than the content. I was just speaking them. Talking at God.
So the rite had more in common with the spells of the Druids or the chants of the Voodoo doctor and cemented in my mind the mystique of communicating with the supernatural. It is only recently that I am discovering the freedom of talking to God as a real entity.It feels awkward at time because there was a certain safety in talking from behind the formality of prayers that had been composed hundreds of years ago. But that formality is just a barrier I feel. It makes me feel like I'm pontificating -now there's a word with a host of meanings.The story of the Tower of Babel always seemed like a cruel God-prank to me.
Here were people using their God-given talents to show how they could get the humanity show off the ground and in comes the deity to spoil it all. What would have happened if they had been allowed to build their tower? That's a question for God. But does conversation with God have to be a formal show consisting of someone babbling in latin or english for the masses to follow? I don't think so. I think its about opening my mind and letting God in. And I want to recognize it as God's voice not some subconscious babbling of my own. I understand that hearing voices is the swiftest way to the asylum.We've all got them buried away inside us. I want to distinguish between those and the voice of God. And maybe to do that I have to think with the innocence of a child and admit my invisible friend to come sit with me. Which would turn Paul's philosophy on its head. When I was a child I spoke like
an adult but now I am a man I must put that aside and think like a child. I'll let you know how I get on.

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